Midwifery is one of the most emotional and emotive of all the health care professions. In order to be'with woman', we give a part of ourselves to every woman that we care for. Such reciprocity is essential to create a relationship that will maximise a woman's birth experience (Hunter 2006). This relationship between the woman and midwife is considered to be one of the key elements in job satisfaction, as it emulates the very essence of being with woman. In order to meet the emotional needs of a woman, the emotional involvement of the midwife is needed (Rothschild 2006); thus there is a potential emotional cost associated with care provision. This article is the first in a series of six articles looking at the maintenance and promotion of midwives' own wellbeing and resilience. The series will cover these topics: the resilient midwife, the mindful midwife, the self-compassionate midwife, the assertive midwife, the acknowledging midwife and the relational midwife. All are aimed at embracing and encouraging a midwife's own wellbeing and resilience.